The following blog post uses identifying-first language which aligns with the current preferences in the Autistic community. We understand that everyone is on their own journey, and acknowledge they have the right to choose their preferred language.
Definitions of Terms
Transgender is an umbrella term used when an individual has identified that their gender identity or gender expression is different to their birth-assigned sex. Gender diversity is a term used to describe when an individual’s gender identity, role, or expression differs from the cultural norms prescribed for people of a particular sex. Gender identity is defined as an individual’s personal sense of gender and is based on each person’s internal and individual experience of gender. A person’s gender identity may be the same or different to their birth-assigned sex. Gender expression is how a person presents their gender outwardly through mannerisms, interests, and appearance.
Gender Expression in Children
Almost all children begin to express their gender identity at around 2-3 years old. It is normal for all children and teenagers to experiment with their gender expression to aid in the development of their identity – children can do this through self-talk, clothing choices or wanting different hair styles. Many people including children can feel discomfort or distress when their birth-assigned sex is different to the gender they identify with – this is known as gender dysphoria.
Gender dysphoria symptoms can present differently at various stages of your child’s development, but these can become increasingly more debilitating with the secondary sexual characteristics that develop during puberty (facial or pubic hair, changes in voice, development of breasts). Gender dysphoria is not a mental health condition. However, many children with gender dysphoria experience other mental health concerns. An individual may experience gender dysphoria but not choose to transition.
Signs of gender dysphoria in young children
- Your child insists they are a different gender
- They get upset when they are called gender specific terms for example boy/girl or brother/sister
- Show signs of childhood anxiety.
- Go to the toilet in a way that’s associated with a different gender – for example, your gender-diverse child who was assigned as female at birth might stand up to urinate
- Ask you to call them by a different name and pronouns like ‘he’, ’she’ or ‘they’
- Ask you questions about their gender.
- Voice concerns about not liking the physical signs of their sex or want those that much a different gender
Signs of gender dysphoria in teenagers
- Feel strongly or tell you they feel unsure about their gender identity differs from their assigned sex a birth
- Ask you to call them by a different name or pronoun like ‘he’, ‘she’ or ‘they’
- Want to get rid of the physical signs of their sex or our child might say they want to use medication to become more masculine or feminine, or they might start wearing clothes that hide their body
- Shows signs of teenage anxiety, particularly in social situations
Gender Dysphoria and Neurodiversity
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and gender dysphoria are isolated diagnoses however, there is an increasing amount of research that shows there is evidence of the association between gender dysphoria and ASD. Studies of children, youth, and adults with gender dysphoria have identified characteristics and experiences of ASD at higher than anticipated rates. From a large population of children, research was able to identify that those children diagnosed with ASD were 4 times more likely to have gender dysphoria. Research does not highlight any increase in prevalence in gender dysphoria with a particular assigned at birth sex, this is only true in non-autistic children
The ability to communicate and think about what gender means to your child may be delayed if they have ASD, and these may not be obvious. Autistic children might follow a different pattern of forming their gender identity, therefore symptoms of gender dysphoria or an altered development of gender identity might increase feelings of gender dysphoria in Autistic children.
How to support your child
- Psychological counselling. Psychologists play an important role in supporting both your child and the family as your child explores their gender identity, they are also able to aid in the diagnosis of comorbid mental health conditions.
- Ensure that you create a supportive environment both at home and in school that affirms your child’s gender identity to aid in the improvement of their mental health outcomes.
- The chosen path of care should be highly individualized as no two children’s experience is the same
- Covering easily accessible mirrors and using a big sponge or loofa on a stick when showering to help manage body image struggles can be used to help some children manage their experiences of struggling with body image issues.
- Encourage your child to express their feelings – sharing feelings in a notebook, or express how they feel through an art, craft or music project.
Resources to help support your child.
Books for your child:
- It feels good to be yourself. This book was written by a mother of a transgender child, it provides young readers and parents with the vocabulary to discuss this important topic with sensitivity.
- A house for everyone. This book is a very simple story that challenges gender stereotypes and shows 4 to 8-year olds that it is ok to be yourself. This book will assist parents to provide their children the space to explore the full spectrum of gender and will show children the many ways they can express their gender in a truly positive light.
- Red Crayon. This book can be used to facilitate discussion about inclusiveness and allows your child to being true to your inner self and following your own path despite obstacles that may come in the way.
Books for Parents:
- The Transgender Child: Stephanie Brill. This book is a great source of information for parents and other family members to use to help understand and affirm a child’s gender exploration.
Websites/Blogs for adults:
- Parents of gender diverse children. This website contains resources, blogs and state multi-disciplinary practitioners to better support your child as well as parent support groups.
- Gender center: Support service in Annandale and website containing resources and further information
- Emerging minds. This website has a large resource bank that contains a variety of videos, podcasts and blog posts for parents.
Sources:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8977566/
https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.3109/09540261.2015.1111199?needAccess=true
